Downieville

So this past weekend Alix, kiddo and myself wen’t up to Dville for the weekend. Lots of bikes were ridden, I got rowdy and also managed to have a nice big batch of body issues served up as well. A lot of this centers around not being able to control how photos are taken of me and of angle and posture and shit like that. Just. Guahhhhh.

So. I have been dealing with it the only way I know how… being a big ball of emo and not knowing wtf I’m doing with my life other than making it harder for myself and my family around me. I’m trying very very hard to keep out of bad habits with regards to starving myself in a feeble attempt to loose upper body muscle and mass and then pushing myself too hard with activity to burn more calories.
The balancing act between being sedentary to encourage muscle loss and being active so I don’t fucking kill myself is getting harder to maintain.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh
Nope.
Nope.
Nope.
Nope.

This sucks, but for now I’m off to go put my kid to bed and then go back to crying over the fact that I started this shit too late in life.